The Secret to a Long Life (Part 2)

Things changed then. It went from novice pranks to serious business. It came about when another neighbor had a survey done and Jack realized that Henry's fence was six inches over the line. Jack insisted that Henry move the fence or he would tear it down. Now, that fence had saved a lot of heartache. It stopped the borderline fist fights over real and imagined slights, keeping both pugilists in their respective corners. Besides, the fence had been there for years. When Jack went ot see a lawyer, as luck would have it, there was still time to do something about it before the new property line took effect. Jack's lawyers sent off an official letter that day, the first shot across the bow of a whole new battle. With it, the money began to flow.

Lawyers, like any animal, fill a necessary niche in God's creation. Some compare then to sharks, others object that they are more like parasites. In truth, they tend to be marvelously skilled surgeons. They specialize in cutting, delicately, into the wallets and bank accounts of their own clients. They have a public code of conduct that they ignore, rather, follow a private agreement, which commands the ruthless fleecing of the public. More zealous adherents to a set of laws are difficult to find. Of course, not all lawyers behave in such an unscrupulous way, only the living.

The flurry of letters that ensued would have made a Montana blizzard proud. Every day the proxy war of the lawyers promised to bring financial ruin, even prison time to the adversary. Both Henry and Jack gloated over the sweetness of a winning lawsuit, never dawning to the realization that they were, in fact mutual victims. Their lawyers were friends and collectively manipulated the two in a profitable and masterful way.
Two years later, after all the lawsuits and counter suits, the fence still stood where it always did, and will. Henry and Jack, finacially drained and emotionally exhausted had only one thing to show for the effort. They both had enormous liens against each other's property. Since moving was out of the question, whoever died first would surrender to the other. It became a race to the end, a matter of survival of the meanest. That race had been going on for nearly half a century.
For fifty years they resourcefully plotted the demise of the other. Voodoo dolls not with pins, rather icepicks through the head, arsenic painted tomatoes, traps ingeniously laid and plots planned precisely. They, by luck and care, survived it all.


to be continued....